Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Mixology 101

Before getting any further into this mixological adventure I hope you'll follow me on, you should be warned that there are some ground rules.

Almost certainly, many an exploratory cocktail excursion has ended with the words "that's disgusting!" and a returned, or poured out, drink. Indeed, most of the times I've ordered a drink that doesn't have the ingredients in the title (e.g., rum and coke, gin and tonic) at a bar, the result doesn't even approach the quality I can achieve at home.

Why?

The answer is deceptively simple, and yet nearly impossible to achieve at your average bar.

The three most important rules when making a cocktail are:

1) Measure your ingredients.

Seriously. Knowing the ingredients of a drink may be a moiety of the knowledge required to make the drink, but it's incredibly easy to botch a drink entirely if you don't know the proportions. While it's true that the proportions of most drinks that consist only of a base and a modifier (i.e., any drink that consists of a liquor and a single mixer) are eminently fudgeable, more complicated drinks can be utterly destroyed by misproportioning.

A perfect example is the Churchill Downs Cooler, a refreshing race track classic that--even when given the exact proportions--most bartenders have proven totally incapable of reproducing. Why? They don't measure the ingredients. No matter how good you are, it's incredibly difficult to free pour a half ounce of anything, and more than that amount of triple sec will turn pretty much any drink into a sickly-sweet mess of fake-tasting orange flavour. So unless you're experimenting with proportions on a new cocktail of your own making (and even then you should measure so you know what you did!), stick to the recipe.

2) Use fresh citrus juices.

At least for lemon and lime. And at least for your first time trying a drink. I can't adequately express my horror when I ask at a bar if they have lime juice (and am answered in the affirmative), and end up with lime cordial or Rose's lime juice instead.

If you can get your hands on an unsweetened bottled lemon or lime juice, you might be able to get away with that, but I haven't bothered trying myself. It's well worth juicing a half or full lemon or lime to get the 1/2 or 1 oz. of juice many recipes call for. Orange, cranberry, pineapple, and grapefruit juices are usually fine out of a tetra pak, but you just can't beat a freshly squeezed lemon or lime. So before you decide that the Gina I recommended you try in my last post is lousy, make it with a fresh lemon.

3) Use plenty of ice.

Cocktails must be cold. This is something that bars don't get wrong, but I frequently see people at home trying to fudge it. Unless you're drinking red wine, or brandy, single malt, or other fine liquor neat, a drink needs to be cold. In addition, cocktails that call for shaking (which is most of them) rely on the ice shards that end up in the drink after being vigorously shaken with ice.

So when you're shaking a drink, fill your shaker with ice (yes, to the top, or at least very nearly), and pour all of the ingredients over the ice. Then shake your shaker vigorously until it becomes almost too cold to hold (or just the metal half if you're using a Boston shaker). Water should condense on the outside surface of the shaker before you're done.

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A perfect illustration of these principles occurred when I attempted to order an Acapulco at a Lower East Side bar last month. This drink had become a favorite at home during a time when all I had at home was a full bottle of Bacardi Superior (an inexpensive light rum) and a quarter bottle of Cointreau. I foolishly tried to get an average Manhattan bartender to make it for me....

After getting the bartenders attention, I gave her an inquisitive look and motioned for her to come closer. "Do you have simple syrup?" I asked.
"What?" she replied. I should've known to go with something simple right then, but foolishly I ventured on.
"Simple syrup," I said, louder.
"No."
"Sugar, then?"
"Oh, yes."
"Lime juice?"
"Of course."

So, having ascertained that they had approximately the ingredients I required, I went on to describe how to make the drink.

The result was the single most disgusting thing I've ever paid any fraction of $11 for. And as you can probably guess, I paid all of $11 for it.

Why was it so awful? The bartender in question violated every one of the above rules. The lime juice they "of course" had was in fact lime cordial, she didn't measure any of it (in particular the sugar--the result was sickeningly sweet), and when she handed me the drink it wasn't nearly cold enough.

So the lesson? Stick to the recipe, shake well, use the correct ingredients (admittedly, I was responsible for the use of sugar in place of simple syrup), and...

...don't try to order complicated drinks at a bar.

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Churchill Downs Cooler

A race track classic, the recipe I have seems to be totally different from the most common one seen online (which involves crème de banane and pineapple juice). I haven't tried the other version, but the recipe I present here will appeal to anyone who enjoys a refreshing, carbonated drink of any sort.

Pour into a highball glass filled with ice:
1 1/2 oz. Kentucky bourbon
1 oz. brandy
1/2 oz. triple sec (or Cointreau)
4 oz. ginger ale
Stir.


Acapulco

Given the name and the ingredients of this drink, I'm assuming this is one of the many cocktails invented in the Caribbean to make rum more palatable.

Shake the following over ice, and pour into a cocktail glass:
1 1/2 oz. light rum
1/2 oz. Cointreau
1/2 oz. lime juice
1/2 oz. simple syrup

Optional (either, or both):
Include 1 egg white with the above
Garnish with a fresh mint sprig

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So what the hell is simple syrup?

Simple syrup is called for in quite a few cocktail recipes. It's incredibly simple (and cheap!) to make, and it's used in place of sugar in many drinks because it mixes better. I would highly recommend saving the next liquor bottle you finish off, making a batch of simple syrup, and pouring it in. Just keep it in your fridge, and it'll easily last for at least a month.

In a small saucepan, bring to boil:
1 cup water

Remove from heat, and add:
2 cups sugar

Stir until sugar is totally dissolved
Let sit until room temperature
Refrigerate

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Huzzah! I salute you, actually, for many's the time I wish I knew some delicious drink to request.

This is perhaps a bit lowbrau for this blog, but I thought you might appreciate it anyway:
Modern Drunkard on Andre the Giant

jvs said...

“It usually takes two liters of vodka just to make me feel warm inside.”

Wow. Just...wow.

Sarah Glidden said...

so, when will your next cocktail party be? jamil and i will bring fancy cheese! i would try to make one of these drinks at home but the only ingredients we have now are vodka and ice.

jvs said...

get some vermouth and a cocktail shaker, and you've got yourself a vodka martini :) Sometime in the next few days I'll be doing a post on vodka....

As for our next party, Bess and I are currently in discussions...sometime in the next 2 months for sure, though I'm agitating for sooner.

jvs said...

Sorry to the person whose comment I just deleted, but I don't do flame wars with 'anonymous.'

If you'd like to post your thoughts somewhat less acrimoniously (and maybe read my post a little more closely) I'd be happy to have a discussion with a professional.